Author Topic: Old Hats SpeakEasy Lounge  (Read 10340 times)

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Online alta

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Re: Old Hats SpeakEasy Lounge
« Reply #120 on: August 26, 2018, 04:44:36 PM »

The Louisiana State Police had received numerous reports of illegal cock fighting being held in the area around Abbeville and had sent their famous Detective Boudreaux from Thibodeaux to investigate. Boudreaux promptly began his investigation and then reported to his Commander the next morning.

"Dey is tree main groups involve in dis rooster Fightin", he began.

"Good work! Who are they?" the Commander asked.

Boudreaux replied confidently, "De Texas Aggies, de local Cajuns, and de Demcratic Natnal Char from N'awlins".

Puzzled, the Commander asked, "Now Boudreaux, how did you find all that out in one night?"

"Well," he replied, "I went down and done seen dat rooster fight in person. And I knowed immediately dat dem Aggies was involved when a Duck was entered in the fight."

The Commander nodded, "I'll buy that. But what about the others?"

Boudreaux nodded knowingly, "Well, I knowed de Cajuns was involved when sumbody bet on de duck!"

"Ah, I see, I see ... " sighed the sergeant, "And how did you figure the DNC was involved?"

"De duck won!"
Knowledge is knowing that the Tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is knowing that you shouldn't include it in a Fruit Salad

"Oh bother" said Poo, as he chambered another round

Online alta

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Re: Old Hats SpeakEasy Lounge
« Reply #121 on: October 27, 2018, 08:34:38 PM »
Hat has lost his flock  :(
Knowledge is knowing that the Tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is knowing that you shouldn't include it in a Fruit Salad

"Oh bother" said Poo, as he chambered another round

Offline DC_1908

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Re: Old Hats SpeakEasy Lounge
« Reply #122 on: October 28, 2018, 08:30:50 AM »
Hat has lost his flock  :(
😆😆🤣
yeah where the hell has The Bread been?

Offline DC_1908

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Re: Old Hats SpeakEasy Lounge
« Reply #123 on: November 09, 2018, 09:09:21 PM »
just . . . because

Online alta

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Re: Old Hats SpeakEasy Lounge
« Reply #124 on: November 09, 2018, 11:33:50 PM »
does anyone remember when Comedy Central was actual comedy?....





« Last Edit: November 10, 2018, 12:37:15 PM by alta »
Knowledge is knowing that the Tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is knowing that you shouldn't include it in a Fruit Salad

"Oh bother" said Poo, as he chambered another round

Offline ArJunaZ

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Re: Old Hats SpeakEasy Lounge
« Reply #125 on: November 20, 2018, 11:00:28 PM »
I think I'm in Love !   :lmao:



Now I know what Canadian men do during those long boring winters. :disbelief:
"The Central Intelligence Agency owns everyone of any significance in the major media."
  -- William Colby (Former CIA Director, 1973-1976 - from Dave McGowan's 'Derailing Democracy: The America the Media Don’t Want You to See (2000)')

Online alta

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Re: Old Hats SpeakEasy Lounge
« Reply #126 on: November 20, 2018, 11:11:04 PM »
I don't even want to know the search words that found that 8)
Knowledge is knowing that the Tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is knowing that you shouldn't include it in a Fruit Salad

"Oh bother" said Poo, as he chambered another round

Offline Mickstix

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Re: Old Hats SpeakEasy Lounge
« Reply #127 on: November 21, 2018, 11:56:42 AM »
Hat..  Speak to us old timer!!  Hope all's well my friend..

Offline Maacoshark

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Re: Old Hats SpeakEasy Lounge
« Reply #128 on: November 21, 2018, 01:02:07 PM »
I think I'm in Love !   :lmao:



Now I know what Canadian men do during those long boring winters. 8-0
   Is that you Ajr? :wackysmile:

Online alta

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Re: Old Hats SpeakEasy Lounge
« Reply #129 on: November 28, 2018, 12:25:19 PM »
this seems awfully familiar, but I can't quite put my finger on it  :huh: .....


Knowledge is knowing that the Tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is knowing that you shouldn't include it in a Fruit Salad

"Oh bother" said Poo, as he chambered another round

Online alta

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Re: Old Hats SpeakEasy Lounge
« Reply #130 on: December 17, 2018, 01:01:46 PM »
The admin here needs to do a better job of monitoring who is joining this group. We have a new member, an elderly man. He’s been privately messaging members, sending naked pictures of himself in nasty poses along with close ups of his unmentionables. He is offering an iPhone 8+ in exchange for sexual favors. I am especially bothered because it turned out to be an iPhone 6 and something’s obviously wrong with it because it’s really slow and the caps lock is stuck on.
Knowledge is knowing that the Tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is knowing that you shouldn't include it in a Fruit Salad

"Oh bother" said Poo, as he chambered another round

Online alta

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Re: Old Hats SpeakEasy Lounge
« Reply #131 on: December 19, 2018, 09:47:54 AM »
 :-\

















 :lol:
Knowledge is knowing that the Tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is knowing that you shouldn't include it in a Fruit Salad

"Oh bother" said Poo, as he chambered another round

Online alta

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Re: Old Hats SpeakEasy Lounge
« Reply #132 on: January 27, 2019, 01:31:13 AM »
An old blind man walks into an all-women biker bar and takes a seat at one of the bar stools. He orders a whiskey and says “Hey bartender! Care to hear a blonde joke?” The women next to the man says “Hey there cowboy, to be fair, being blind and all I figured I’d give you a heads up. We’re an all-women bar, the bartender is a blonde with a baseball bat. The bouncer is a blonde black belt. I’m a 6 foot 6, 170 pound professional wrestler. Our chef is a blonde professional weight lifter. Our DJ is a blonde and she’s a professional fighter with a billy club. Are you sure you still want to tell that joke?

The man thinks about it for a second and says “You know what, I’ll keep it to myself. I don’t want to have to explain it 5 times
Knowledge is knowing that the Tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is knowing that you shouldn't include it in a Fruit Salad

"Oh bother" said Poo, as he chambered another round

Offline ArJunaZ

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Re: Old Hats SpeakEasy Lounge
« Reply #133 on: February 26, 2019, 08:01:06 PM »
A guy walks into an ice rink with a monkey.
The monkey grabbed some olives off the bar and ate them.
Then he grabbed some sliced limes and ate them.
He then jumped onto the ice and grabbed a puck.
To everyone's amazement, he stuck it in his mouth and somehow managed to swallow it whole.

The bartender looked at the guy and said, "Did you see what your Monkey just did?"
"No, what?" replied the man.
"He just ate the hockey puck...whole!"

"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy, "he eats everything in sight. Sorry and don't worry, I'll pay for the puck."
The guy finished his drink, paid his bill, paid for all the stuff the Monkey ate and left.

Two weeks later the guy came back, and had his monkey with him.
He ordered a drink and the monkey started running around the bar.
The Monkey found a maraschino cherry on the bar.
He grabbed it, stuck it up his butt, pulled it out, and then ate it.

Then the monkey found a peanut, and again stuck it up his butt, pulled it out, and ate it.
The bartender  asked, "Did you see what your monkey just did?"
"No, what?" replied the man.
"Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry and a peanut up his arsh, pulled them out, and ate them!"

"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy.
"He will eat anything, but ever since he had to pass that hockey puck, he measures everything first."
"The Central Intelligence Agency owns everyone of any significance in the major media."
  -- William Colby (Former CIA Director, 1973-1976 - from Dave McGowan's 'Derailing Democracy: The America the Media Don’t Want You to See (2000)')